TAOISM
'Shit happens'
CONFUCIANISM
'Confucius says, "Shit happens"'
BUDDHISM
'If shit happens, it is not really shit'
HINDUISM
'This shit happened before'
PROTESTANITY
'If shit happens, let it happen to someone else'
CATHOLICISM
'If shit happens, you deserve it'
ATHEISM
'I don't believe this shit'
AGNOSTICISM
'What is this shit'
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